Slightly better.
Apr. 14th, 2011 10:02 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
alexandraerinI'm feeling slightly better. I went out. I read book 15 of Fables and two other things I've already forgotten. I got rained on and such and I ended up feeling really wobbly when my poor night's sleep caught up with me, but I'm feeling better for having walked away from the computer and gone out for a bit.
The one inescapable thing about my job right now is that I really can't get away from the computer while I'm working. I can write on my phone and even my Kindle a bit, but not at anything like the speed I can at my computer, and I'm getting really comfortable with the Google Docs/blog combo thing. I mean, 1,000-1,500 words an hour comfortable. And sometimes I need to refer to the site for various reasons... offline copies of the story are fine up to a point, but I can search the live version more ways... so blocking myself from my own site while I'm working isn't really an option.
Things are going so well and I don't want to blow it. I have to keep reminding myself that I haven't blown it; that I am done with the writing that needs doing this week. It would be really unfortunate... and silly... to let my whole work life thing I've got worked out fall apart because one guy is really bad at reading my incredibly not-subtle "back the fuck off" signals and I'm really bad at ignoring and/or dealing with him.
This is generally what happens, though. Again, I'm not blaming anyone else. This is my issue to work on. I think the immediate issue is resolved and I'm going to push on with what I've been doing.
I just... I don't like the feeling of being told how to do my job. I know what I'm doing. I've stopped seeking out criticism and stopped engaging with critics elsewhere on the internet. I don't feel like playing hostess to them on my own site, even if they like 99.98% of what I'm doing and are therefore superconcerned about the 0.02% I'm getting wrong.
The one inescapable thing about my job right now is that I really can't get away from the computer while I'm working. I can write on my phone and even my Kindle a bit, but not at anything like the speed I can at my computer, and I'm getting really comfortable with the Google Docs/blog combo thing. I mean, 1,000-1,500 words an hour comfortable. And sometimes I need to refer to the site for various reasons... offline copies of the story are fine up to a point, but I can search the live version more ways... so blocking myself from my own site while I'm working isn't really an option.
Things are going so well and I don't want to blow it. I have to keep reminding myself that I haven't blown it; that I am done with the writing that needs doing this week. It would be really unfortunate... and silly... to let my whole work life thing I've got worked out fall apart because one guy is really bad at reading my incredibly not-subtle "back the fuck off" signals and I'm really bad at ignoring and/or dealing with him.
This is generally what happens, though. Again, I'm not blaming anyone else. This is my issue to work on. I think the immediate issue is resolved and I'm going to push on with what I've been doing.
I just... I don't like the feeling of being told how to do my job. I know what I'm doing. I've stopped seeking out criticism and stopped engaging with critics elsewhere on the internet. I don't feel like playing hostess to them on my own site, even if they like 99.98% of what I'm doing and are therefore superconcerned about the 0.02% I'm getting wrong.