Weird Random Insight
Apr. 18th, 2011 05:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
alexandraerinIt occurs to me that at this point in my life/career, I'm actually often pretty okay with criticism in the sense the word is usually used... it's advice that really has the magic button-pushing power over me. It's only because criticism so often carries with it implicit or explicit advice that it makes me see red so often.
I mean, when I look back (metaphorically, I'm not actually going to go back and read the comments) on the comment exchanges that I really got worked up on at the time, that's the common thread. If a commenter just leaves replies that implies he thinks Mackenzie is a hero with a thousand faces on a journey through the belly of the beast so she can fire off the gun on the mantelpiece from act 1 to defeat her antagonist or whatever, I'm inclined to find it amusing. When I see the same commenter telling me that X needs to go where Y is and Y should be replaced with Z... RAEG.
And I then start interpreting all the commenter's nonsense as containing implicit advice: This is the way stories are supposed to be, so this is the way you should be doing it...
I've known that I don't take advice well, and I've often thought that it's like a subset or special case of my aversion to criticism. But now I'm thinking I had that backwards.
I think the proof of this insight will be when I try to apply it, under the theory that understanding why some criticism pisses me off so completely will help me to control that reaction. Because when I get unwanted advice that I can tell is well-meant and is by somebody I perceive as a friend or at least a well-wisher, I usually do manage to avoid flying off the handle at them.
I mean, when I look back (metaphorically, I'm not actually going to go back and read the comments) on the comment exchanges that I really got worked up on at the time, that's the common thread. If a commenter just leaves replies that implies he thinks Mackenzie is a hero with a thousand faces on a journey through the belly of the beast so she can fire off the gun on the mantelpiece from act 1 to defeat her antagonist or whatever, I'm inclined to find it amusing. When I see the same commenter telling me that X needs to go where Y is and Y should be replaced with Z... RAEG.
And I then start interpreting all the commenter's nonsense as containing implicit advice: This is the way stories are supposed to be, so this is the way you should be doing it...
I've known that I don't take advice well, and I've often thought that it's like a subset or special case of my aversion to criticism. But now I'm thinking I had that backwards.
I think the proof of this insight will be when I try to apply it, under the theory that understanding why some criticism pisses me off so completely will help me to control that reaction. Because when I get unwanted advice that I can tell is well-meant and is by somebody I perceive as a friend or at least a well-wisher, I usually do manage to avoid flying off the handle at them.